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My son is 3, yes 3 and still has NEVER used the toilet!! He is my second child my daughter did very well and was diper/pull up free by 2.5! I don't understand why my son will not go in the potty! I have tried everything that I know of. for the last 3 days I have kept in only underware at home and kept taking him to the potty every 10 to 20 mins. We were once in the bathroom for 45min!! It's like he waits until right after we get out of the bathroom to pee!! Yeasterday I was determind to get to go in the potty so we could have a big party and celebrate, but it never happen. I had to put a pull up on him twice to go out and after having the pull up on for an hour he was soaked! It was as if he were waiting all day to go in the pull up! I need help! The day care he goes to will not let him come back in Aug if he is not potty trained!!

Oh spamom, I know this is stressful! Have you tried the naked approach? I had to do this for the first few days with my Ryan and Ethan. Underwear felt like I guess a diaper to them. When they were naked, they could see what they were doing and would realize there was nothing there to catch the pee and poop, or urine and bowel movements, take your pick, lol.

This time of year is ideal, because it is warm. I was given this approach from a couple of elderly ladies. They said that is what they use to do “back in the day”.
It worked for us. Make sure you pick up all your rugs for a couple of days and stay in a tiled or wood floor areas if you can.

Once I decided to potty train, and it sounds like you are at a good time and age, it also sounds like he has pretty good control, I would never put them in a pull up or diaper again. This may mean you have to stay home for a few days. I only did a pull up at night just when they are getting in bed, after they peed and only for a couple of weeks.

I am not a big advocate of pull ups, I think they are too much like a diaper and little ones feel free to "go in them". Maybe some other moms have testimony on whether pull-ups worked for them.

Just know I am rooting for you and your son. This is a tough stage. Good luck and I hope you will be successful soon!

Thank goodness someone else is in my situation. I have been going crazy trying to get my second child Sean trained. My first son was fully potty trained by 2 1/2 years old. Sean is more difficult. I have tried the naked approach as this is what I did for David and it worked wonderfully. I never used pull ups with David but have with Sean and I agree all he does is use them as diapers. I think Shawn is right I just need to stay home for a few days and leave him naked.

I have tried treats, games, awards, stickers - it doesn't matter he just always goes back to the pull ups. Actually, he did his best one day when we were out and I had forgotten his bag and had no more pullups to put on him. He did so good, did not have one accident. But the next day forget it he was back to one accident after another it is just so frustrating. Personally though I think it is me at this point, I just need to give in to the mess it makes and leave him naked and take him out with underwear. I know he knows when he has to go pee or poop because when he is naked he will beg to have a pullup on and I will bring him to the potty and sure enough he goes.

Good luck with yours and I let you know if anything works.

Just an update! WE HAVE SUCCESS!! My son is doing well now He is down to 1 to 2 accidents a day and they normaly happen if he is really into playing inside or out. I tried the naked approch and also tried to think it into reallity. I would wake up and say today is the day it didn't work the first day but the 2nd day we were in business. I have now even ventured out of the house with underwear and all went well!! Thanks for your ideas!!!

I started again today as well. He did awesome while we were out, no accidents at all but did have one accident this evening. I am just going to keep it going accident or no accident. No more pullups except at night and during nap. Congrats on the success and I can't wait to be able to say the same thing.

I have twins that just turned 3 that I am trying to potty train. They are both doing well during the day. I still put pull-ups on them when they go to bed, and when we are going to be in the car for a long time. They still pee at night, but for the day, what seems to work is - I have tried putting them outside naked with a potty seat. Told them not to pee in their pool, to pee in the potty. They peed on themselves once and now they use the potty seat outside. If you don't like pull ups, try the thicker traning underwear and pair them with the plastic pants that go over cloth diapers, to save on the mess during sleeping and when you're out of the house. I tried those before when they were napping and when we're in the car. That way they didn't have the security of a diaper, and didn't want to pee on themself, the underwear are not as absorbant as a diaper, so they feel the pee all over them but the plastic pants help protect the seats and bed from accidents. My son only peed in his once, so I don't remember if it leaked at all. Shouldn't, they go over cloth diapers. Just don't forget to bring a couple spare underwear and plastic pants in case of an accident. I also tried telling my daughter not to pee on her Dora panties by telling her don't pee on Dora, she'll cry. If she had an accident, she would come to me and say "Mommy, Dora's crying." It was funny. When we go out, I just tell them not to pee in the pull ups and I am constantly asking them if they have to pee, and every time we stop anywhere, I take them to the bathroom and put them on the potty and tell them to go pee, they always do. It is really just consistancy. You have to keep asking them if they need to go, keep reminding them to tell you that they need to pee, tell them not to pee in their underwear/pull-ups, take them to the potty even if they say no and tell them to try anyhow, just keep taking them to the potty over and over. I usually waited about 10-15 minutes after they had a drink, and would take them. I always told them they did a good job, even if they only went a little, or tried and couldn't do it. Make them pee before leaving the house and going to bed, too. I also make mine pee before baths, and tell them not to pee in the tub. I tried letting my son pee on a tree in the yard while we were outside, he thought it was fun and was constantly telling me he had to pee. If they pooped, I dumped it from the diaper in the potty and told them to flush the poops, poops go in the potty. All kids are different, but those are the things I tried and they seem to be working for mine, during the day anyhow. Don't forget clean clothes when you leave the house. I did that once, that was lots of fun. Just keep asking them, taking them, reminding them.

Thanks for the ideas. Sean does so well when we are out and about, no accidents at all. At home is a different story - I will take him potty and maybe 10 minutes later he will have an accident. The only thing I can think of is that maybe he isn't getting it all out. I will try the putting the poop in the potty that might help alot.

spamom- is all still going well? Thank you for your updates ladies.

People keep preassuring me to potty train Lilly. I am the one just not ready. She isnt even 2 yet- well- she will be on June 30th- but still- I would rather wait until she is closer to 2 and a 1/2.

My fingers are crossed for all of you going through this right now!

All children have a set time for each milestone. Don't let anyone pressure you or your child. Pressure will only lead to backsliding later. I & others pressured my first, believing that he might be the first super child ever born! First week of school, and we began having issues! My second son trained himself at three---when he got good & ready! Never an accident afterward. I will allow my grandboy, Hayden, to choose his own timing as well. His father was the one that I pressured, so I'd be a fool to take the chance on Hayden's temperment!!

I agree, I think each child will know when they are ready. All we can do is show them what to do and have it avail to them.
Mine is almost 2 1/2 and she runs from the potty but she seems to be interested when I go to the restroom. So I tell her what I'm doing each step and now she tells me what to do. haha
I think she's getting more interested in going on her own but I don't want to push either. I mention the potty daily and she knows what it is and may even go sit on it but doesn't go, but thats ok we'll keep taking her in there.

Do you ladies like the pullups? Do they hold the urine overnight well?

I hate the pullups for training purposes. All it did for my son was stand in as a diaper.

On another note. I stuck with my guns and have kept him in underwear and he is doing wonderfully. He has about an accident a day but he is so excited. (He even went poopy in the potty without me bringing him yesterday) Yeah!!!

Good luck to all of you

I'm a K-2 preschool teacher - I get paid to potty train 2 yr olds. Heh.

That said, I can tell you that in my experiences, potty training children *know* that it's the one single thing in their lives they can control. No amount of yelling, threats, punishment, begging, pleading or bribing can change the power they feel when they know they alone hold all the power over something as simple as going potty. Can you imagine the enjoyment they must get from watching the hoops a frustrated parent will jump through to coerce a kid to potty?

Here are some of my thoughts on the issue:

Don't pressure them. AT ALL. Not even a little bit. Ask once in a while, but if they say no or don't produce any results... just smile and nod.

Rewards work nicely. But only when given to a child who has GONE POTTY on the toilet. No treats for sitting, or asking to potty or "trying" even. Make it something they never get otherwise - an exclusive potty treat.

Don't EVER refer to pull ups as big boy/girl pants. They are diapers, plain and simple.

If you are at home, make them wear regular underwear around the house. When you leave the house, put a pull up OVER the top of the underwear. This way, they get the wet and uncomfy feeling of an accident without the public mess.

I really have a lot more I could say, but I don't want to come off as a preachy newbie. Hope this helps!

Bizeemomma,
Are you kidding me, your not a preachie newbie, PLEASE tell me more!!!!!
You are putting my mind at ease with my 2 1/2 yr old who knows she holds that power. haha

Awesome advice. It was when I finally stopped "aggravating" my son to go and just put him in underwear at home that he decided it was neat and time to go potty. He is doing wonderful.

bizeemomma if you have more info i would love to read it. i really want to get on to this stage but my 2 1/2 yr old doesn't want to.