PolkMoms.com

Although I love sharing my experiences and advice, I will never pretend to know everything. Just so now, Ladies, I need your advice.

My husband is at the vet now having our dog, Meeko put to sleep. He is riddled inside and out with tumors and has severe nerve damage in his spine. He is 11 years old. Great Dane’s lives are usually shorter than other dogs. I could go on, and on, about how he is the best dog in the world, and as you probably know; I am crying my eyes out as we speak. I love my dog! Even though my grief is great, the advice I need would be for my children, especially Ryan and Lilly. They are 3 1/2 and 20 months. They love him dearly too. I am trying to remain composed in front of them. I don’t want them to see me upset. Right now they don’t realize anything is wrong, Meeko goes for Vet and grooming appointments so they have seen him gone before. When days go by, they will know. How do you explain this to children? Meeko is their very best buddy, he is the best kids’ dog! They have not had to deal with death. Any advice on the explaining of this to them would be great. Thank you in advance.

I can say my heart goes out to you and your family. I am not sure if there is an easy way to explain it. As many as we have had I should be able to think of something. It always helps to be honest and just tell him that Meeko had to go to a better place to be able to play with other dogs.

I am so sorry to hear about Meeko. We lost our Cocker Spaniel Jordan in 2005 and my boys were 5 and 3. It was very difficult because the day Jordan died my husband had to go out of town on a business trip, so I was left to explain to the kids that Jordan had died. He died in the front seat of my mom's car on the way to the vet. Very emotional day for me at work. He was 12 1/2 years old. My mom and dad took care of everything. My dad went to the humane society and got a little coffin. When he got home from work we went over to my parents and my dad and boys buried Jordan in the back yard. They were able to tell him good bye and put some things in the coffin with him, so I think that helped a little.
My granny had died about 10 months before that so I told them he had to go and be with granny, so they took it a little better.

If you get a chance google Rainbow Bridge, it is a poem about loosing a pet and where they go. My vet sent it to me a few days after Jordan died and it meant a lot. I will not lie, it is a tear jerker.

Sorry for the long post, but I feel for you. We now have a 95 pound lab named Bailey who the kids just love, but every once in a while they will mention that they miss Jordan. Good luck and I will be thinking about you today.

Shawn,
I am so sorry for your loss!
It's hard to explain when kids are as young as yours but I have to agree with everyone else and just be honest with them.
Good luck! {hugs}

Thank you ladies for all your kind thoughts on here and in emails. It means a lot and proves the ability of an online unity and family. Much heart felt thanks,
s

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how you are feeling, we had a very similar situation 2 yrs ago.

We had to put our Dalmatian, Lucky, to sleep. Lucky was 10 yrs old. I had gotten him before I gotten married and had kids, so it was the hardest on me. He had started acting like he had a problem with his leg, a nerve problem. The vet couldn't find anything wrong, so she suggested some specialists. I never knew there were vets that specialized in things like Internal Medicine, Neurology, etc. We took him to specialists and still couldn't determine the problem. He acted so ill, he had always been an active (I believe happy, also) dog. It just broke my heart. The vet finally determined that he had a tumor on his spleen. The vet gave us a couple options: put him to sleep, do nothing, or remove his spleen. After much discussion and praying, my husband & I decided to have the vet remove his spleen. I just felt that we needed to help him fight it. He would have good days & bad days. After the surgery, he was like a puppy again! He was well for about a month, then he started acting sick again. The vet got the results back from the biopsy to find that he had a cancerous tumor, hemangiosarcoma (I think that is how it is spelled). It was a very aggressive and large tumor. The vet had warned that the tumor could come back, but there was know way of knowing where or when. It had come back in his liver and kidneys. This time, he nor us could fight it. We had to put him to sleep. I don't regret the surgery, because it gave him a month of feeling good and he made it to his 10th bday.

I, too, was not sure what to say to my daughter who was 5 then. I hated her to see me crying and upset. She knew he was very sick. My husband & I told her that he had gotten too sick and he had to go to Heaven to feel better. She seemed okay with that. She still asked every so often about him and said that she missed him.

After much begging (from hubby & daughters), this past Christmas we "rescued" a mix breed from the pound. We now have an 8 month old Lab mix named Lucy. I (really all of us) still miss Lucky, but enjoy having Lucy around.

Once again, I am sorry for your loss. It's harder than we imagine. I never thought I would get so attached to a dog! Also, sorry that this post has gotten extra long. Once I got started I had a hard time ending it! I'll try to cut back on my words next time!

Tricia, and everyone, please dont feel you have to shorten your posts. With so many words, it brings us all a better understanding of each other. Tricia, thank you for sharing so much of your journey with Lucky! It really could help someone else in a similar situation.

Days have gone by, and Ryan and Lilly haven't asked about Meeko. I know Ryan understood that Meeko was really sick. The only thing he said was today, he said "Meeko is our dog, I love him". I hugged him and did my best to hide the instant tears. Meeko was my dog before I married Eddy. He was my single mom dog when it was just Ethan and I. Ethan was 2 when I got Meeko, he can't remember life with out him, it has been so hard.

Thank you again everyone for your kind thoughts our way.

I'm so sorry for your loss, for your family's loss.

American, Thank you for your beautiful post and thoughts.