PolkMoms.com

My boys were just cracking me up yesterday morning on our way to church. Alex told me he was moving far, far away when he becomes a grown man...to Lake Wales...oh, and when he grows up and his wife is homeschooling the children (I loved that one since we homeschool) they will be allowed to play junk on the computer (junk is what I refer to any of the games that are not educational)whenever they want and he will buy them all the toys they want, even if they make bad choices.

And he's having 4000 kids and they will be all boys.

I LOVE it, Jasmine! 4000 boys!!! What a hoot! Isn't it precious though, when they see the value in something we are doing like with homeschooling and want to do it too? Ours say the same thing about homeschooling and their wives will breastfeed and carry their babies in slings, too.

And "far, far away" to Lake Wales is just sweet. And it's interesting to realize the things they consider like the toy or computer comments. Do you write down what they say in your plan book or calendar? We try to, we think it'll be fun to read back what they tell us and sometimes, not so fun.

Our older son will always say he's going to attend church's Men's Prayer Breakfast and is deeply offended when we tell him he can't. His reply is always, "I'm growing to be a praying man!"

So far my one year old has not said anything yet to embarras me, but I am positive it is coming. I will tell a story about my friend's boys. She has triplet boys and when they were three they had gone into KFC and one of the boys starting yelling "Mommy, will you please buy us some porn!" She was mortified.

The funniest story I can remember about my stepdaughter was when she was about 3 years old. My MIL was putting her shoes on her and they must have been a little snug and she was struggling to get the shoes on her, my stepdaughter said oh sh*t, my MIL then said what did you say and she quickly responded, Nana I said glory, halleujuah, praise the Lord. My how fast was her brain working!

When Jordyn was two, I was kissing her all over her face and she was giggling as only a toddler can. When I stopped, she caught her breath, gave me a huge grin and said, "Lissa's (Our puppy) been licking my face...And she licks her BUTT!"

Lisa and Courtney, your stories are FUNNNNYYY!!

I have to share - A few months ago, we went on a field trip to the Orlando Theatre to see the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. They used a sound device to enhance the witch and the lion a couple of times, but the first time with the Lion, it was to create a huge roar. Well, when it happened all went silent, that is until our older son squeaked out a "Help!" It was timely and cracked all us parents up!


As we were getting ready to go to the Meet Up a couple of Saturdays ago, I overheard our older son ask our younger son, "I wonder what we'll be like as Daddies." I thought how sweet as I waited for a reply. Neither said much more, but I responded that they'll be amazing fathers. Our older son said, "Yea, but how will we look?" They thought they'd look completely different. I told them like themselves just bigger.


I was listening to our boys playing when a dispute broke out. They couldn't seem to resolve it, so our older son said, "Let's go call Joel Osteen, he'll know what Jesus wants us to do!"


Our younger son is really trying to wrap his mind around concepts like sin, forgiveness, and amends. He asked me "Why can't God just make all the sinners good?" Good question, huh?!

I know, me again!

I wanted to tell you what our boys said yesterday.

They were playing a game and the one asked his question, the other replied. The asking one said, "Are you being honest?" the other replied, "Yes" and the asking one said, "Well, only God and you know what's in your heart." And followed it up with "And God knows my heart! Your turn"

I LOVE that!

okay I have one that Ryan said today that I thought was cute.

It was tonight before the kids went to bed. Ryan and Lillian were very fussy/cranky.

They decided to grab onto a leg a piece (mine) and fight over me. Ryan would say, "my mommy!" and Lillian would say, "No! My Mommy" you all get the picture- this went back and forth, oh say, 40 times.

I finally detatched the little suckers and told them, " I am mommy for you both. I am Austin's Mommy, I am Ethan's Mommy, I am Brandon's Mommy, I am Ryan's Mommy, and I am Lillian's Mommy.

With out skipping a beat Ryan said, Mom; Your Daddy's Mommy too"

I smiled and said, yep, sometimes

My son was 4 when he saw Toy Story..the one that has the mean kid who doesn't treat his toys right. There is a scene where he takes a magnifying glass and burns a hole right between Woody's eyes, on his forehead. We were out in public a few days later and saw an Indian woman with a red dot on her forehead and my son yelled "Look Mommy! She has a spot on her head like Woody!" He still refers to his father as "brown" sometimes, and my inlaws are "brown gramma and grampa". He told me he fell at school one day and the brown people helped him. I tell him to describe people by what color shirt they are wearing, or if they are taller, or their hair color...He just loves to put adjectives in front of stuff. Coke was "Brown juice". Saltines are "square crackers". He called the school psychologist "the old lady". One day we went to KFC and sat inside. He had never been there. He said "Wow, this sure is a fancy restaurant!" Later he said "OH MY GOSH LOOK AT THAT BIG FAT GRILL (grill means girl). SHE'S GONNA BREAK THE CHAIR! He kept saying it and pointing. I was mortified. I had a really long talk with him about it, and I used disabled people as an example. The next day we saw someone in a wheelchair and he pointed and said "look mommy!" He just doesn't get it! He had speech delays so I wonder if some concepts will take longer for him to understand. It seems totally innocent right now, like he isn't trying to be mean...he's just very curious still and can't think of a polite way to express himself. So he embarrasses me quite often.

My older son is 4 years old. He started preschool this fall. We were having a conversation about it, and he said that we wants to get his teacher a present for Christmas. I said that sounded like a good idea - do you know what you want to get her.
He said ''Sure, I am going to buy her a Wedding Ring''. I thought it was very cute, I started to respond, and then he said ''I am going to marry her''. I thought this was very cute.
I guess it is good that he likes his teacher.

Things they say............
Well this reminded me of my 13 year old, and her response to what she wants to be when she grows up.
Not a doctor, or nurse, teacher, well respected member of the community.....oh no, not mine.
Her goal in life is now to be a breifcase girl on "Deal or No Deal".
How proud am I.....?!?

These just crack me up! Di dyou guys read Scrappin Moms post about her son waiting in the lobby during an appointment and entertaining everyone as he picked up a magazine with Tiger Woods' image on the back saying "Daddy?" I just read that!

quote:

Originally posted by -1 TIRED MOMMY:
Things they say............
Well this reminded me of my 13 year old, and her response to what she wants to be when she grows up.
Not a doctor, or nurse, teacher, well respected member of the community.....oh no, not mine.
Her goal in life is now to be a breifcase girl on "Deal or No Deal".
How proud am I.....?!?

I'll admit that is funny, but take comfort in knowing that a lot of those girls are extremely well educated and successful outside of DOND. There are even a couple of lawyers (or may still be in law school, but on their way no less)!

Shannon, DOND girls get to wear all the finest and latest fashions! And I have heard what littleT has, too, how educated they are.

I have a funny one for you---

We are getting ready for bed and the boys are picking out a story for me to read. Well, our younger son comes up and says "Mommy, Super Sex!" I was putting dishes in the washer and was like - I had to have heard that wrong - so I asked "Ah, what?" trying to be nonchalant and not raise suspicion it may be something I disapprove of - you know, then he'll say it for weeks, right - and he says "Mommy knock-knock" I reply "Who's there?" He replies, "Ssss" I say "Ssss who?" He replies, "Super Sex!" and pushes a book in my face titled, NOT Super Sex, but Super SPECS!

Breathe a sigh of relief with me ladies! Inhale and exhale! lol

Anyway, I read the title correctly and then he looked at it, too, and said, "You're right"

The book is a Math Matters book titled Super Specs about a young girl who gets glasses and is teased by her brother, only to have her outwit him through math skills where he learns that isn't a nice thing to do. Hey, there is a lesson in there! lol

I just had to share, now I'm off to read an age appropriate book for my young ones!

i finally have a funny one to add.
the other day my almost 3 yr old is playing with her dolls, and she burps. she looks at her father and i and says oh excuse me i am soooo embarassed.
we about died rolling on the floor laughing.

also now that i'm pregnant she has been rubbing her belly and telling us her baby is hungry.
it's so cute and funny. i love it! i can't wait to see what she thinks of doing when she feels my baby start to kick. lol

Our younger son is begging me for an ice pop - his leverage - telling me it's fruit! I said "it is not!" He said "well it's fruit juice - when it melts!" Gotta hand it to him - he is creative!